Loving The Skin You're In

A couple of months ago my best friend tagged me in that Facebook meme "Five pictures where you feel beautiful", but I never did it. I've always had a difficult time in being able to find myself pretty and beautiful. I would usually consider myself on the lower-side of being average looking. I've dealt with self-esteem issues for as long as I can remember, and negative thoughts still tend to invade my brain on the daily. However, the other day I looked in the mirror and something happened that hasn't in a long time.



I looked in the mirror at myself and I felt like I looked good. I didn't automatically start to criticize my body, something I normally do. I saw my curves and actually appreciated them. I saw my arms with their extra arm flab and didn't immediately go to pinch it and pretend the fat wasn't there. I saw my non-existant abs and the little pooch of fat I have where they would normally be. I saw my big, thunder-thighs and calves. My awkward feet. My odd proportions. But I wasn't upset. I liked the way my body looked. It was like, "Hey self, its starting to get cold again, and that extra fat you've got is going to provide you with added warmth! Those big thighs help you run around campus and Target all day". I was seeing the good in my body. My first thought wasn't that I needed to go and lose five pounds. It was that I liked the way I looked.

"But what about your face!" some of you may be saying. Sure, it's one thing to love your body, that can be changed, but you're pretty much stuck with your face. I don't really have beautiful features, I'm definitely not a classic beauty. But I'm learning to love my face. I have big eyebrows, and a small mouth, but they can work for me. I have eyes that can change their color (not literally) based on the clothes I wear. I have perpetual bags under my eyes, and I've got a big 'ol nose that my daddy blessed me with. I'm learning to appreciate my features way more than I ever have, and its a great feeling.

My best friend has been there through it all with me, and a couple of years ago when I was really struggling with my self-esteem, she wrote a few words to me that have really helped me out these past few years when it comes to loving myself:
  
  -- True beauty is not measured by how many boyfriends you've had or what size you wear. Real beauty is acceptance of yourself and all of the wonderful things you have to offer.

Let me tell you, friends. Right now I'm feeling happy. I'm feeling good about myself. I'm finally beginning to accept myself, ALL of myself, and for one of the first times in my life I feel beautiful.